Tears of an Angel
by Moonchild707
Summary: Bella jumped and Jacob wasn't fast enough. One-shot of Edward's reaction, from Bella's POV as an angel, as she says her last goodbyes to them. Sad, but worth the read. May make sequel for when they are reunited.


**Tears of an Angel**

I had done it. Jumped. Off the cliff. Relieved from the pain. But I still wasn't happy. He was in agony, blaming himself, and shutting everyone out. I was with him now, watching him sob dryly over my grave. It caused unneeded tears to form in my eyes as I watched him self destruct. I had died that day, leaving everyone behind. I watched him scream and cry at my funeral, and my burial. I watched as he shut himself out of life and everyone in it. He shunned his family, and their heartbroken attempts to comfort him. I watched as he grew angry, and attacked his mother for mentioning my name. I watched as he cried his heart out after, ridden with even more guilt and remorse. I didn't need Jasper's gift to feel it. I watched now, as he placed a letter on my headstone, accompanied by a single freesia. Anguish tore at my heart as I watched him kiss the letter. I wanted so badly for him to see me, to reach out and let him know I was here. To comfort him. As he placed the letter down, I saw the rain start to fall, drenching him as if the skies themselves cried with him. He stood up, and walked away. I walked up to my headstone, and gazed sadly.

_Isabella Marie Swan_

_Sept. 13, 1988- June 7, 2005_

_Beloved daughter, sister and love_

I felt terrible. I had left a depressed Charlie, an angry Jacob, and a devastated, broken Edward. I had ripped apart a family for my own selfish wants. I bent down, picking up his note. Slowly, I opened it, scared of what would be inside.

_Bella,_

_I do not know how to express my feelings right now. They cannot be put into words, but I will try, love, for you. _

_I am sorry I left you. I didn't mean it. I'm sorry that your last breath was wasted announcing your undying love for me. I'm sorry your life is gone. I will never again hear your heartbeat, or see your beautiful blush again. I'm sorry, love. I truly am. _

_You must know that I love you. I love you more than anything. You were my existence, my driving force if you will. But now there's nothing. I want you here so badly, to hold you, and love you, but that chance is gone. My selfishness took it all away._

_You also need to know that my family loves you. Rosalie feels terrible for treating you badly before. She loved you like a sister, even if she didn't show it._

_I will see you soon enough, love. Know that I refuse to exist without you here. I will be joining you soon, in heaven. I hope vampires can get there. I am going to end it myself. For you. For us. I am broken, lost without you here. I need you. When you died, so did my heart_

_I will say goodbye to Carlisle tonight. He will be devastated, but will respect my decision. I only hope he will be able to comfort the others after I am gone. I will love you forever, my lamb, know that._

_With all the love in my heart,_

_Edward._

Tears were flowing freely now, down my pale cheeks and onto my flowing white gown. He was going to kill himself. I knew what that would do to his family. They would break. Two children, gone. A brother and a sister, stolen by their own selfish mistakes. I couldn't let him do that. He needed to live, and exist. For me. For his family. For himself. I couldn't take him too.

I followed the trail he'd used, silently gliding down the path. I knew where he was. He was at home, planning his last goodbye. As I approached the house, I could literally feel the waves of despair, guilt and anger rolling of them. I knew they were all home. I glided invisibly to the yard. The rain was slowing now, leaving the clouds to clear. I watched in amazement as my skin became visible in the sunlight. Vampires glittered, and angels became visible. I felt a slight breeze hit me, and my scent blew with it. I heard many intakes of breath as my scent hit them hard. I heard a moan of anguish as he smelled it. I wanted them to come out here. I needed them to know I loved them. Jasper wasn't to blame. I loved Rosalie. Emmett needed to be strong. They needed to know my last goodbyes to them. As if they had heard my thoughts, they all came out into the yard. I heard intake of breath as I looked up at them, my soulful brown eyes deepened with pain and wisdom.

"Bella?" I heard a disbelieving voice ask. I looked over to see Edward's pained face staring at me. I smiled and nodded. He rushed forwards. He tried to hug me, only to break into dry sobs when his body could not touch mine. I knew I was only an illusion to him. I was only a spirit. I gazed sadly at him. How I wished to become solid. I reached out, and touched his arm. He gasped sharply, looking back up.

"You can't do what you're thinking of doing." I said in my soft, musical voice. He looked up sadly. I could see his family gazing in shock. I smiled at them. I surprised myself by being able to touch him. I pulled him to his feet, and looked at him.

"Bella, I can't live without you. I won't." he whispered, anguished. A fresh tear fell at his confession.

"You can, and you will. If you love me, you will live your life to the fullest. Move on. I will always love you. Know that. Your time will come, and I'll be here then. Your family needs you." I whispered. He looked torn. "If you love me, stay with your family." He groaned and fell to his knees again. Slowly, I left his side and went over to the others. Esme was dry sobbing next to Carlisle, who looked both happy and pained. I hugged Esme gently.

"He'll come around. He loves you. I love you too. We will meet again." I said to the two of them. They smiled sadly at me, as I turned to Rosalie. She had tears in her eyes that would never fall.

"Rose, you keep them in line." I joked, gesturing to Emmett and Edward. She smiled a bit, and moved to hug me. I felt new tears fall at the bond we would never have. I could tell she was sorry. Emmett stood beside her, looking heartbroken

"Em, be strong." I said, looking up at his face. He chuckled a bit at me.

"I'll miss you. You are my baby sister." He said, his voice breaking. I felt terrible for making him almost cry. I hugged him tightly around the middle, and let more tears fall. "Angels shouldn't cry." He whispered as he let me go, and I moved to Jasper.

"Bella, I'm sorry." He gasped brokenly. I placed a finger on his lips, stopping him. He looked at me anguished.

"Don't feel guilty. I know. If it helps any, I forgive you, Jasper." I said, looking at him. He truly looked pained and sad. "Please don't be sad." I pleaded, my voice breaking. He smiled sadly, before pulling me into a strong hug. I held him back, knowing it would be the first and last time. I turned next to the broken, sad face of my pixie. She was dry sobbing, looking at the ground. I literally burst into tears, and threw myself at her. She sobbed into my shoulder, before pulling away, her chin quivering.

"Alice…" I began, but just ended up sobbing again. She should never be so sad. It's not right. She looked at me sadly, knowing it would be a long time before we saw each other again. I couldn't stop my tears now.

"Guard him with your life." I said to her, looking over to my dry sobbing angel. She smiled sadly at me, and looked to him. I hugged her one last time, before moving back to Edward. He stood up, and grabbed me into a tight hug. I leaned into him, relishing his smell and feel. I knew it would be almost an eternity before we met again, and I would miss him.

"I love you." I whispered to him.

"I love you too." He whispered brokenly. I hugged him harder. I could feel myself fading here in his arms. He seemed to notice, and held me tighter. I could feel him sobbing,

"Don't go." He pleaded brokenly. It tore at my heart to hear the deep need and desperation in his voice.

"I will be there. Waiting. Always." I reminded him. "I will always be listening. I am yours. Your own guardian angel." I whispered, my voice becoming faint. He held me tightly, as I faded back into invisibility. When I was nothing more than air, he sighed. For the first time in a long while, I was completely floored. I watched as he stared at the place where I had vanished, and he smiled. A full, beautiful crooked grin. He turned around, and ran to his mother and sisters, embracing them each in turn. No one spoke. He hugged his brothers and father, and pulled away. He turned around, and locked his eyes on the exact spot I was in. He came over, and stood inches in front of me. I felt a tingling as he kissed my invisible forehead.

"Forever, my lamb." He whispered, and somehow I knew, he and I both would find our happily ever after.


End file.
